Stahlke Adoption

"Sarah with an H"

In the orphanage, when we first told the children about their English names, they didn't react very much. We knew that they didn't comprehend the importance of this information. Now, over two years later, they definitely get it.

Olena was the first to embrace her new name. It helped that "Sarah" sounded just like the surname of her best friend in the orphanage. Once she was in the U.S., she quickly met several teenage girls at our church named Sarah or Sara, and she was very happy to be named like them. As our most precise child, she always has a question for any new Sarah/Sara that she meets: "I am Sarah with an H. Are you?"

Some of the other children didn't take to their new names quite as quickly, especially the older ones (understandably--could you imagine changing your first name?). About five days after arriving in the U.S., we were preparing them for their baptism at St. John's. Jonathan's father, who officiated at the ceremony, asked each of them what name he should use for them at their baptism. He went around the circle, starting with one of the younger children. They knew that Ruslan didn't like his English name, and that for such an important event, they needed to do what he would want. As we asked each child around the circle, they all gave their Ukrainian name. Then it was Ruslan's turn, and he thought about it for a long time. Finally, he said, "Paul," to everyone's astonishment. You should have seen the other children backpedal as they "changed their minds" and asked to be baptized with their English names!

I've mentioned before that the children use their English names in public and their Ukrainian names at home, and that I must remember to use their English names when anyone else can hear me. Between school and playing with neighbors, the children spend most of their day using their English names, and about six months ago, they started using the English names with each other. Jonathan has also made the switch, so I'm the only one in the house consistently using Ukrainian names. I've decided, however, to wait until they ask me to switch, because I feel it's important that they be the ones to decide.

Last week Misha asked me why I call him David at school and Misha at home. My response was to ask his preference. "Call me Michael!" (Michael is the English equivalent of Mihailo, his Ukrainian name, while Misha is like Mike.) "No, Misha, Michael is not one of the options for your name. You can be David or Misha." Confronted with the choice, he decided to keep the status quo: "You can still call me David at school and Misha at home."

A few days ago, the younger children had another conversation about names. They commented how Luda's name sounded very similar to their birth mother's name (Luba). Misha explained to me that shortly after Luda was born [years before his own birth!], it got confusing in the household when anyone yelled for Luda or Luba and both would answer. So, Misha explained to me very seriously, his birth father decided to call her Rachel to clear up the problem!

posted by Stahlkes @ 10:32 AM