Stahlke Adoption

Kids Can Be Mean

Our adoption training from LSS was pretty thorough, and they told us our kids might be teased about being adopted. Sure enough, shortly after Christmas break, Lena met me after school with a very long face. One of her classmates, someone she considers a friend, had told her that she didn't like her anymore because she is adopted. Their teacher, who is very experienced, was concerned and explained the whole situation to me.

Because of our training, I knew what to say:
"Your friend doesn't understand adoption, Lena. It is actually very special to be adopted. Papa and I chose you to be our daughter. We wanted you very much, and we are very happy you are part of our family. Families are formed in different ways, and one of those ways is adoption.

"Sometimes when another child is insecure and doesn't feel good about herself, she might say mean things about others. She is doing that because she thinks it will make her feel better about herself. That doesn't mean her comments are true. You need to remember that you are special, and Papa and I love you very much."

Lena's face relaxed, and she looked like she felt better. I decided not to approach the classmate's parent unless the problem happened again. It hasn't, at least up to now.

posted by Stahlkes @ 5:13 PM