Stahlke Adoption

"Babysitting"

At church yesterday, I had fifteen minutes between services and decided to pull out my Bible. Turning to my favorite book, Philippians, I scanned the first half. One phrase really jumped out at me--"Do all things without complaining" (v. 14). Ouch! I debated whether I should erase my last post. Instead, I'll tell you what God did on Saturday to help me heal from a difficult week.

While I was driving around Chicago on Friday afternoon, Jonathan was teaching a class for parent's weekend at Concordia. As a thank you, the Office of Student Life invited Jonathan and me to join students and parents for a cruise on Lake Michigan and the Chicago River. Two good friends, David and Susan, agreed to watch the kids for the evening. They had a good time with them--grilling hamburgers in the backyard, decorating cookies, and getting to spend some time together.

It's very difficult for us to find "babysitters" (Ruslan hates that term, and after all, he IS thirteen). Many, many people have kindly offered to watch the kids, but our children are very active, and there are five of them, all at different levels of maturity (or not!). But even more, they are leery of being left with anyone besides us. They know that, in a moment, one can lose family and community, because it happened to them in Ukraine.

Over the last two years, they've gotten better about Jonathan and me being gone for a few hours. The first time or two, we noticed they were acting out for several days ahead of our "date." Even after several times away, Olena always hugs me more the day that we're leaving. Before our boat cruise Saturday, Misha showed the most stress. About an hour before our departure, he took a framed picture of his first-grade class and gift-wrapped it, complete with a greeting card, ribbons, and ancillary gifts (like a paper cross, since I "work in a church.") He carefully presented the entire package to Jonathan and me, making sure we got a good send-off on our journey in case we didn't return. The next morning, he ran pell-mell into my arms, SO relieved we were back.

To handle these fears, our "babysitters" must work in pairs, and they have to be people the children know very, very well, and have seen in other situations multiple times. That's the only way the kids are willing to let us leave for a while, since the fun of visiting with their adult friends can balance their fears. David and Susan gave both us and the children a wonderful gift Saturday. The kids had a great time, and Jonathan and I shared a quiet evening on the water. Of course, we talked about the kids most of the time!

posted by Stahlkes @ 11:38 AM