Info from Masha
Jonathan telephoned Ukraine this morning. At the SDA offices today, Masha submitted our visa and letter, which were duly registered. The SDA set another meeting time for her next Monday, when they will give her our appointment date. She must be at the SDA offices next Monday in person, which entails a ten-hour round trip train ride from her home to Kyiv. She took the extra trip in stride, however, telling us that it's just part of her job.
Masha feels that an August appointment date is likely, so we continue with our preparations.
The Floodgates Open!
On Tuesday, we finally wired the the$600 translation fee to Masha. My parents loaned us the money until we could access $600 from the Stahlke Adoption Fund at our church, and the wire actually went out from my parents' bank. We used the bank information that Masha had sent to us, including her account number, her legal name (Mariya . . . ), her address in Kramatorsk, her bank's name and address in nearby Donetsk, and all the intermediary banks through which the wire would travel. Since the wire's first stop was the Bank of New York, we paid the domestic rather than the international fee--$15. Beats Western Union at $50!
On Wednesday morning, we telephoned Masha to tell her the money had been sent, and also to ask her for news about the adoption. First, she told us that our package had finally arrived--at her bank!! The clerks there received our package with Masha's name and the bank's street address, city name, and zip code. They almost sent it back to the U.S., but someone looked up Masha's name and realized she was an account holder. They telephoned her, and she picked up the package immediately (on Tuesday).
(Later, I figured out how we made such an error. Rather than digging through past Email for her address, I consulted her recent messages about the translation fee. The street address under her name in the message was not her home address but rather the Kramatorsk branch of the Donetsk bank.)
Masha translated the letter and visa on the same day she picked up the package. She also notarized both of her translations and secured an appointment time with the SDA. On Wednesday, when we talked to her, she was preparing for her train trip to Kyiv that very day. The appointment is on Thursday at 9:00 am, and since Ukraine is eight hours ahead of us, she will talk to the SDA less than an hour from the time I'm writing this blog post.
She hopes to find out a travel date for us, hopefully in August. We will telephone her on Thursday morning our time to find out the news.
Still No News
We're waiting to hear if Masha received our package with our letter to the SDA and our newly-extended visa. She will also tell us when she travels to Kyiv to submit these two documents.
Western Union
I tried three times today to send $600 to Masha for her translation work on our dossier. The first time, the clerk couldn't get a connection to Western Union's main website. She asked that I come back later, and she would work on the connection in the meantime.
Several hours later, the Western Union connection was up and running when I returned to try again. This time, my credit card authorization failed. That puzzled me, especially since I had called the credit card company ahead of time, and our account had plenty of available credit. It took a long time to work my way again through the credit card company's phone tree, but finally I was able to clear up the problem, which was just a technical detail. But the long wait must have been too much for the Western Union staff, who may have thought that I was a financial risk. They informed me, after all that had transpired, that they would only take cash! Considering it was after 5:00 pm on a Friday afternoon, finding that much cash was not possible. I was NOT a happy camper.
But . . . we then thought about trying the Western Union website with our credit card. By internet, however, Ukraine is not among the few countries that allow transfers to banks. Since Masha provided us all her bank account information, I'm assuming that's where she wants the money to be sent.
Well, I tried pretty hard today. Now it's the weekend, and sending the money will have to wait until Monday.
Tracking the Package
Masha wrote yesterday, asking for the tracking number of our recent package to Ukraine. I sent the visa and our SDA letter last Thursday, July 17. A look at the USPS website told us that the package cleared Ukrainian customs last night at 6:00 pm. After that, it continued its journey to eastern Ukraine where Masha lives, and she will travel to Kyiv to hand-deliver it for us.
Then and Now
It's summer in Chicago, just like three years ago when we traveled to Ukraine. As we think ahead to our upcoming trip, the weather is about the only thing that's the same.
This time, many aspects of our coming journey are familiar. We are well-acquainted with Masha and Andrei, our facilitator and her brother, our driver. We know the accomodations in which we will reside, and the cities where we will eat, shop, and sight-see. The legal process is still complicated, but we've been through it before. We have visited Mikola's orphanage, which is only three blocks from the children's home where our five kids lived. Mikola's orphanage is a cheerful place, with flowers in the front yard, lots of windows, and freshly painted walls with bright pictures.
This time around, however, we have five children back home. They are very excited that soon they will probably see their little brother again. They are also fearful of our leaving, and apprehensive that Mikola's adoption might fail. At the moment, Paul, Adam and Rachel are acting more settled, probably because they are older and can better understand what is happening. Sarah and David have been a handful, and I keep reminding myself that they are going through a whole lot right now.
Bedtime Song
My Bonnie lies over the ocean
My Bonnie lies over the sea
My Bonnie lies over the ocean
Oh, bring back my Bonnie to me.
Bring back, oh, bring back
Oh, bring back my Bonnie to me, to me
Bring back, oh, bring back
Oh, bring back my Bonnie to me.
From Teeth to Nails
The children's teeth have required a great deal of treatment over the last three years. Our wonderful dentist, who is well-versed in dentistry and child psychology, has blessed us with both her dental care and the generous gift of insurance-only billing. So when Paul complained about pain in his upper right teeth, and I had some sensitivity to cold drinks, we quickly made an appointment for yesterday morning. If Jonathan and I are traveling soon to Ukraine, I'd rather not do so with a toothache and the need to find a dentist in Kyiv.
After our dentist took a look at my teeth, she concluded that the problem was not a cavity, but teeth-grinding from stress. Now what in the world could I be anxious about? Paul then went in and received the identical diagnosis! So we received samples of Sensodyne toothpaste and the potential for mouth guards later in the fall.
The other children are also showing their excitement and anxiety about Kola's coming. The younger kids all made his bed two nights ago, finding a mattress protector, sheets, and a cute blanket, and then making welcome signs in Ukrainian to hang nearby. They are finding outfits for him among the bags of donated clothes we've received. We've also seen some acting out at VBS, as well as difficulty sleeping. And some of them are chewing on their nails like they're corn on the cob.
Back to yesterday--
In between the already-scheduled dental visits, VBS, a tennis lesson, youth pizza party, and a counseling session, Jonathan and/or I managed to write the letter to the SDA, notarize the letter and the I-171H, travel downtown for the apostiles, and mail the package to Masha. It was a rough day.
We knew that the Ukrainian papers are very time-sensitive, and we couldn't make contact with Masha to know where to send them (to her or the SDA). She lives a long way from Kyiv (five hours by train), so it made sense to mail them directly to the SDA. But then Jonathan reminded me that she has hand-delivered all of our official correspondence in the last year. So, we made two official copies of each document, with everything notarized and apostiled, and mailed one set to Masha. If we find out later that the documents need to go directly to the SDA, we have a second set ready to mail.
I made it home from the post office, pretty wiped out, and went to our bedroom to stretch out on the bed. Who did I see there but our dog Dakota, biting his nails!
(By the way--
Masha wrote us today with the news that she wants to hand-carry the letter and I-171H to Kyiv. Whew!)
Visa in Hand
Our visa became available on the same day that my grades were due! I'm finishing up a four-week class at Concordia teaching music bibliography techniques to graduate music students. Luckily, it's a very small class--four this summer and one as an independent study last spring.
With all the adoption events of yesterday, I couldn't concentrate on grading last night. So I set the alarm for 4:30 am and drove to Concordia for a long session. After my grades went in at 1:00 pm, I headed home for lunch and a pow-wow with Jonathan to decide a plan of attack to mail our package to Ukraine.
We initially discussed taking the whole family downtown and celebrating once the mail was off. But as we mentally digested the necessary sequence of events and their associated deadlines, the impossibility of mailing the package today became evident. So . . . we scaled back and decided that picking up the visa was the first critical step. Jonathan was supervising "summer school" with all the kids, so around 2:00 pm I took the "L" downtown to the Chicago DHS office.
It's a good thing we didn't take all the children! They don't wait very well, and it took almost an hour before I could leave with the document that was supposedly waiting for me. But my trip downtown eliminated the time for snail mail, and even more importantly, DHS finally corrected the spelling of Jonathan's name. He has been "JOATHAN" on their documents for some time, and our requests in writing for a correction had not been successful. When the staff member handed me the form, I requested the change, and she arranged for a corrected document while I waited.
I shudder to think of the potential problems in Ukraine with a misspelled document. The staff member at the DHS office today agreed with me that it was important to correct the mistake before traveling!
A Quick Response
I emailed DHS this afternoon about picking up our visa in person rather than waiting for it to arrive by snail mail. When I checked my Email tonight, DHS had already responded that we could pick it up tomorrow at their office in the Loop (yippee!).
Some Answers
Yesterday, Jonathan talked to Wendy. She said to telephone DHS and also write them an Email with "Urgent" in the title line.
Jonathan telephoned DHS this morning and got through to an actual person. She had our file on her desk as they talked, and she answered his questions. The extension is now ready to send to the national DHS office. I'm not sure exactly what that means, but I'm waiting for a return call from Wendy to explain it to me.
It looks like the visa is coming soon.
A Visit to Lilacia Park
There is a time for ev'rything,
A time for all that life may bring:
A time to plant, a time to reap,
A time to laugh, a time to weep,
A time to heal, a time to slay,
A time to build where rubble lay,
A time to die, a time to mourn,
A time for joy and to be born.
A time to hold, then be alone,
A time to gather scattered stone,
A time to break, a time to mend,
A time to search and then to end,
A time to keep, then throw away,
A time to speak, then nothing say,
A time for war till hatreds cease,
A time for love, a time for peace.
Eternal Lord, your wisdom sees
And fathoms all life's tragedies;
You know our grief, you hear our sighs--
In mercy, dry our tear-stained eyes.
From evil times, you bring great good;
Beneath the cross, we've safely stood.
Though dimly now life's path we trace,
One day we shall see face to face.
-
Lutheran Service Book, Hymn 762, sts. 1-3
- based on Eccl. 3:1-8
Message from Masha
Last Thursday afternoon, Jonathan wrote to Homeland Security asking the status of our visa extension. He didn't hear back from them on Friday, so he Emailed Masha that day that we had not yet heard anything. She sent a message back to us this morning, saying that she had to write so at least she would feel like she was doing
something. I think the waiting is as hard on her as it is on us.
When the visa extension finally comes through, we will send it to Ukraine by overnight mail. Masha asked us to include a letter for the SDA (State Department for Adoptions) with our visa, requesting an appointment for August. She doesn't want our appointment to take place later in the fall because the other documents in the dossier would start expiring.
So . . .
We have a proposed month of travel now--next month!--assuming the visa comes through soon and our paperwork in Ukraine doesn't hit a snag because of the late visa.
______________________
Jonathan checked Email again this afternoon and had not yet received a message from Homeland Security. They usually answer their Email within 24 hours (on business days), so we're wondering what's going on. The visa office has a telephone number for emergencies (i.e., if you are traveling within 48 hours). That doesn't fit our situation exactly, but Jonathan and I are starting to feel that we ARE in an emergency.
Before telephoning them, however, I suggested to Jonathan that we telephone for advice from Wendy, our Chicago case worker. She knows more about the Chicago DHS office than anyone else we know. Unfortunately, she's on vacation until Wednesday, but we do have her private cell phone number. I told Jonathan to telephone her despite today being off-hours for her. We don't normally do that, but the tone of Masha's Email today makes me concerned.
Pastor prayed for our family yesterday in church. He reminded us that Mikola's adoption is in God's hands.
Our Visa Expires
Our visa approval expired yesterday after eighteen months of validity. Our renewal application was submitted before the deadline, and as I've written before, we are waiting to hear from Homeland Security if it will be extended.
Masha wrote to us yesterday, knowing that the visa had expired. She is very concerned that this document in our dossier is now outdated, and that the SDA (State Dept. of Adoptions) will deny our request to adopt. We wrote back again to reassure her that we're moving as fast as possible on this end. Homeland Security will not let you apply for renewal until shortly before the visa expires.
Masha also asked us to send $600 by Western Union for her translation work. Our dossier, like all such documents, is very thick, and she spent a great deal of time converting it to Ukrainian for us.
Postscript: Memory Lane
My "Memory Lane" post was written way back on September 26, 2007 and described how ordinary life events could trigger a flood of memories in the children. Since 2007, the amount of Ukrainian we hear at home has dwindled to almost nothing. And along with everyone else, I'm now using their English names almost exclusively.
But our impending trip to Ukraine has brought back memories, if not the language. Almost every day in the last week, the children have recalled their life in the village or the orphanage. Some things they don't miss at all, but other parts of their past life, especially their relationships with certain relatives, create a deep sense of longing for them. I'm not able to understand their feelings, but I do my best to listen and validate what they tell me.
Our trip to Ukraine for Mikola is more than a physical one. The emotional journey for all of us is unknown territory, with both joy and grief intermingled.
Waiting
A friend Emailed me today about when we might travel. In about two weeks, the twenty business days for the SDA to process our paperwork will be completed. If they decide to invite us (which they did in 2005, so it's likely), we will receive a call or Email from Masha with our appointment date. In 2005, we had ten days between notification and travel. Most people get thirty or more days. So . . . we're working hard to get ready!
Postscript: Jonathan's Summer School
As of August, our kids will have been in the U.S. for three years. We are proud of their work learning English, but their short time as English speakers is the reason we are having them read so much in the summer. Their teachers have told us that lots of reading and some independent work in writing are the best ways to improve their skills in all subjects.
Jonathan's Summer School
In the last two summers, all five children have attended summer classes at the elementary school or received private tutoring. This year, Jonathan has arranged his own reading and enrichment program at home. Every morning, the children each read for one hour and then work on a transitional workbook (e.g., between second and third grade, seventh and eighth grade). He has stocked up on fruit snacks that mark the end of each half-hour or hour of work.
The best part of the deal is that they can use their reading time for our local public library's summer reading program. They're pretty pleased that they win prizes each week and stand a fighting chance of winning the grand prize at the end of the summer (a bicycle or Ipod, depending on their age).
Life Goes On
Jonathan and I are in emotional hyperspeed, thinking constantly of the various tasks needed to leave for Ukraine. But routine and not-so-routine parts of life continue unabated.
The two older boys leave tomorrow for a week of camp--the first such experience for them. This afternoon we celebrated Rachel's birthday, since the boys will be gone on the actual day. After cake and presents, I headed to church to play a worship service. Upon my return, a good friend is treating us to a "supper out" in our own home (i.e., she's cooking). As for keeping the household running, the car needs gas, the dishes should be washed, and the laundry soured this morning before I could hang it. Thank goodness for Clorox!
I almost titled this blog post "Acculturation" because one of the kids thought my birthday cake for Rachel needed more sugar. That's a first, too!
No News from DHS
We're waiting to hear from the Department of Homeland Security about our visa--no news yet. Masha has written us more than once to ask for it, and I hope it comes very soon.
The children asked again today for chewing gum. That reminded me that there is a list of things that they absolutely love for which I had no idea before coming a mother. I'm curious if these are particular to my kids or if they are universal to all children:
Chewing gum
Hard candy
Suckers
Bananas
Rap music
Salty foods
Stickers
(Notice that chocolate is
not on the list!)
Be Still, My Soul
Be still, my soul; your God will undertake
To guide the future as He has the past.
Your hope, your confidence let nothing shake;
All now mysterious shall be bright at last.
Be still, my soul; the waves and winds still know
His voice who ruled them while He dwelt below.
Be still, my soul; the Lord is on your side;
Bear patiently the cross of grief or pain;
Leave to your God to order and provide;
In ev'ry change He faithful will remain.
Be still, my soul; your best, your heav'nly Friend
Through thorny ways leads to a joyful end.
-
Lutheran Service Book, Hymn No. 752, sts. 2, 1
